Archive for August, 2010

Skeeter Bites: Can we please nuke the ‘Jersey Shore’?

All thanks to The Real World, Americans have found it acceptable to dive into the lives of knowing participants, follow them through their daily routines, and their sexual conquests during the evening. Nothing has really changed since the first rendition of The Real World and as we find ourselves chugging along in our cattle car to reality television Hell, we stop along the way to witness the absolute wreckage of Jersey Shore.

MTV’s latest pop-culture abortion heads into its second season, poised as one of the most popular shows on the network and includes a cast of characters that I can best describe as one part tanning lotion, two parts hair product and four equal parts of absolutely annoying. Jersey Shore does little more than provide water cooler fodder for people who have nothing better to do than watch annoying people, doing nonsensical and idiotically vain things, all while “fist pumping” their way to below average stardom.

While watching a few of the first season’s episodes – for research purposes only and I cannot stress that enough – I found my intelligence level actually decreasing almost to the point of requiring a cloth to wipe the spittle from the corner of my mouth. The debauchery that is on display in this show not only urges me to vomit violently, but also prompts me to lock my niece in her bedroom until the age of 65. Hopefully by that time, all of the male d-bag members of the Shore cast will have passed on due to dreadful bouts of skin cancer from over-tanning.

The only thing that I can see that would benefit anyone with this show continuing would be is if someone decides to punch Miss Piggy, err, I mean Snooki in the snout again.